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After nearly 12 years I’ve had all I can stand of you
cheeto-eating Johnny clickers. As a long time reg and one of esteemed
importance I felt it was my duty to inform y’all of your many short comings
before I leave forever. How you’ll manage to carry on in my absence I’m not
sure, but that’s none of my concern. It used to be that this was a place one
could come for rational discourse on topics ranging from the impact of
Kierkegaard on the modern existential movement to Bavarian beers. Sometimes we
even talked about sports. However, now we are left with mindlessly inane tripe
of chit-chatters which is counter balanced by the sniping from the self
proclaimed intelligentsia. Frankly, I’m just sick of it all. It’s time for me
to get on with my life.
To all you cheeto-eating Johnny clickers. You know who you
are, no need to name names, and frankly one mention covers you all. Enough of
the posts about so and so’s sick dog. No one cares. Looking for recommendations
on a new vehicle? Do I look like the damned Michelin man? Looking for a good
deal on a TV? There’s this new site called Google, look it up. And yeah, that
Star Wars Kid video on youtube was funny…. 5 years ago. God damn people, why
don’t one of you start up your own board and you can prattle on to your heart’s
content.
Hobbes, you take the flack for the darkside of the board,
and not without due cause. As much as anyone, you have allowed this thing to
come to a head. May a plague of locusts attack your hibiscus bushes and your
tire go flat on the Palmetto.
AUSemperFi – Do you think looking at all that porn is a good
idea? I mean, you’re a father for Christ’s sake. As my final words of wisdom to
you… Karma is watching you, and Sammy’s is always hiring. Oh yeah, and be
mindful of your surroundings when traveling by means of a two-wheeled conveyance.
IJR – As you well know, when a true genius appears, it will
be truly evident since all of the idiots will be in league against them.
Hep – This is the 21st century. By and MP3 player
and get rid of all the vinyl. There will be plenty of free space for Mrs Hep to
get that French armoire she’s been wanting. You never know, there might be some
good recipes hidden in it.
Bear’s Boy – I know you’re lurking. Quit beating your damn
dog you sick bastard.
Aubie in Bham – dude, you really need to get the hell out of
MarshallCounty. Really. I’m serious. I think all
that 2nd hand smoke from the meth labs is starting to get to you.
TJ – How about some more round tables, you lazy bastard.
DBC –That goes
double for you (well, posts, not roundtables), where the hell are you at?
Remus – at least your icon is cool.
To all those that have gone before me – You lucky bastards.
You’ve not been privy to the dissolution of a once great nation, left in
ruination by the mindless chit chat and meager witticisms of the remnants. I
join you know in Valhalla
I’m sorry most of all for Wayne, and that his grand experiment has
obviously failed like so many mouse-poop trials in the winds of assays past. I
was here in the early days of the physiology.neil.uab.edu (or whatever the
hell) server. Back in the days when Mud was a jackass and some dude named WPB
Tiger was kewl. Everything was so new. The board felt alive, like a 15 year old
girl who just discovered the old man in the boat. I’ve seen the board dynamic
chance to the point that it makes me sick to mash that button in my favorites.
Really Wayne,
at this point you could better utilize the server space by hosting midget porn
sites and a mail order poncho service. The purple dragon has farted Wayne, time to put this
bitch out of its misery. But rest easy. Your hard work will live on in all the
hacks and sports boards that have ripped off your code over the past 10 years.
This is it. My last post. So in the words of the immortal
Scarface: #badword# You, #badword# You, #badword# You…. You’re cool, and #badword# You…. I’m out.
