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War Damn Rebel
(72.243.45.130) on 8/17/2007 - 2:47 p.m. says: ( 34 views
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"FLASH: CNN take on weather"
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CNN NEWS
SPORTS & WEATHER
According to a study to be published on Friday, two of the world's
leading climatologists have gone on record saying that the extreme
heat in the Southeast is not a result of global warming. The two
Swedish experts have identified the source of the heat as being
centralized in the Great State of Alabama.
According to their findings, it is a localized phenomenon that has occurred 9 times in the last 25 years.
Apparently, every time the University of Alabama hires a new football
coach the collective hot air espoused from the "Bama Nation" about
National and Conference championships and premature recruiting
"commitments" actually causes a significant increase in air
temperatures in the Southern US. The study went on to confirm that
the natural progression of the following events will cause the heat
wave to subside rather rapidly after the first of September.
Among other things, the scientists note that: UA quarterback Sarah Jessica
Parker Wilson will spend so much time on his back during the month of
September that law enforcement will arrest him on suspicion of
engaging in prostitution; the assistant coaching staff at UA that
couldn't sell Gravy Train at a Michael Vick barbecue,
will be exposed for the inexperienced group that they are; and finally
Coach Nick LepreSaban will be seen firmly clutching his pot of gold
while mumbling to the media about unrealistic fan expectations.The
study has confirmed that by the end of September more seasonable
weather should appear.
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