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Pooh
(68.156.6.33) on 7/15/2004 - 10:44 a.m. says: ( 4 views
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"Gameday changes letter from Ed"
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(EDITED BY AUTHOR: 7/15/2004 - 10:46 a.m.) Edited for clarity
July 14, 2004
Dear Alumni and Friends [and assorted Riff Raff]:
Auburn University is looking forward to an exciting a better 2004 football season, and we hope that you are planning to [send money, but not really] attend. During the last two seasons, we have implemented a number of changes to enhance both the academic environment of the campus and the safety of students, staff, and visitors screw up tailgating as much as we can. Students are Money is, of course, our foremost priority and we are grateful for the cooperation of Tiger fans who understand academics donations come first at Auburn. We appreciate your willingness to assist us in preserving the integrity and educational purpose of the University campus. our coaching buyout fund.
Plans are under way to ensure that Game Day 2004 is a success mess. As always, our top priority for all who are on campus is safety is donating to TUF. Some of the new features and modifications for this year include:
- providing tailgate barbecue for sale at Haley Center and near Plainsman Park [i.e. leave your grill at home];
- making walkways safer by removing vehicles from the concourse and sidewalks [i.e. eliminating popular tailgating locations];
- enhancing the pedestrian access to the core campus by limiting vehicular traffic [i.e. severely restricting your parking options];
- increasing security by making residence halls and new academic areas no RV zones [i.e. eliminating access to bathrooms];
- providing additional shuttle buses [because we make you park off campus];
- increasing safety by restricting parking along Wire Road [please park in Loachapoka];
- prohibiting non university golf carts and all terrain vehicles from campus [like the way we slipped in SUV's?].
To enhance and protect the academic environment of the campus me from the faculty, the game day experience begins at 4 p.m. on Friday before game day [because all our students go to classes on Fridays before games]. Tailgating can start [if you can negotiate the obstacles], and RVs can drive on campus at that time. If you wish to start your game day experience early, you may park in the fields at the corner of Donahue Drive and Lem Morrison Drive Tuskegee at 4 p.m. on Wednesday. All vehicles from game day must leave campus no later than 4 p.m. on Sunday following the game [but we prefer that you get your ass out as early as possible].
For the security of the Auburn campus and its students, we ask that you do not arrive on campus before 4 p.m. on Friday before the game. Signs will be posted that clearly show the times and locations in which RVs and other vehicles may park. This information is also available on the web at www.auburn.edu/gameday
We urge all visitors to park at the locations and within the time frames shown in the signage and on the Web page. Also, please do not park in areas that are protected by bollards, posts and chains, fences, or other physical barriers [we've exhausted our funds for putting these obstacles up]. Our goal is to provide information that is complete, clear, and accessible enough so that few, if any, as much difficulty as possible so that most, if not all, vehicles will be ticketed or towed. You should be aware, however, that the rules will be enforced, and fines will be substantial and will be handled by the municipal court. [If you think I'm kidding, just go ahead and make my day. Don't worry though, fines will not be so punitive as to interfere with your donations]
For the most current information, please consult the Game Day 2004 Web site www.auburn.edu/gameday or you may phone the Game Day 2004 communications office at 334 844 9999. A Game Day brochure and map is now on line and will be available in printed form in August.
We appreciate your understanding about the changes that are being made to improve Auburn University and your cooperation in making Game Day 2004 fun, exciting, and safe. as big a pain in the ass as possible.
Ed Richardson
Interim President
Auburn University
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