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Caveman
anonymous snipe artist
(72.15.95.8) on 2/12/2015 - 12:03 a.m. says: ( 49 views
, 9 likes
)
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"Wrestling Alligators and losing teeth"
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Edited by Author at 2/12/2015 - 12:30 a.m.
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so I broke a tooth and ended up spending most of my morning getting it fixed. But that's a long story, you see my boys found an alligator out behind the house. Well they hollered up and said "Hey dad come here and look at this alligator". Well I figured it was some kind of trick and since they are good boys it was only right of me to walk down there and let them pull one over on me. Well when I got down there sure 'nuff there was an alligator in the creek. Well I hollered up at the house for Rhonda to call animal control that we had an alligator in the creek, He didn't look all that big to me and I've been watching them alligator shows on the history channel so figured I could take this little guy. So I told one of my boys to hold my hat and I told the other one to go get some duct tape I was going to get him. Well I jumped down on what I thought was a little 3 or 4 foot alligator. I caught him by surprise and wrapped my arm around his mouth and locked his moth shut by stucking my fingers in his nose to hold it shut. Well I should have known better, because alligators are like icebergs most of them is hidden below what ever they are laying in and I suddenly realized i had a twelve foot gator by his head. Well he rose up and commenced to flippin' me around like a rag doll. In the mean time one of my boys showed up with the duct tape. Unfortunately my boys, just like me bite their finger nails and couldn't get the tape off the roll. Well I had to get control of this beast so I flung my other arm around and grabbed a deep claw on his shoulder and tilted him over and threw in both legs and tried to get a body scissors on him well he was too big so I just locked em off on his legs double boot style. Well my one son shows up and thinks it will be funny to jump down and start counting back points. The other boy is still struggling with the tqpe and my youngest is hollering let him go daddy before you get hurt. I holler back if I turn him loose he is going to bite my head off. Well about this time My wife Rhonda and my exwife Lynne show up together and all I think is oh hell I am not sure which is more trouble wrestling this alligator or my wife and my ex both hollering at the same time. It occured to me at this time I have a ton of life insurance and I am not sure if they're pulling for me or the alligator. Well my oldest son finally gets the tape to unroll and jumps down to start taping this gators moth shut, my other son is still down saying you got to change control dad to score anymore points cause you can't get the pin from there. Well he finally jumps up and aids getting the gator taped up and after his mouth and feet get taped up I get up all tired and beat up and look down and think to my self I got me at least a nice pair of boots and maybe some luggage and lots of gator meat to BBQ. About that time the animal control people show up and see I got the situation under control. They tell me how terribly risky what I did was and they will take it from there. I was like oh hell no you aint thats my alligator and I plan on at least gettin' some boots and meat out of the deal. But oh no I am informed it is against the law to kill alligators in this part of Georgia and they will be relocating him to a safe place on the Chattahoochee river. So I lost my alligator. I crawl up out of the creek bed all dirty and tired but there is one thing they don't tell you about old alligators on them shows on the history channel, old alligators are dusty and all that dust was up in my nose. I shook my head and my eyes watered and let out the biggest sneeze I gave ever sneezed and when I did I clinched my teeth together real hard and busted one of my teeth. So that's how I busted a tooth wrestling a dusty old alligator that made me sneeze real hard. that's my story and I am stickin' to it!
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Starred by:
aubie in bham
MIAUTIGER
Aubiece
Fowl River Tiger
BATJAC1
AUTIX
Liti-Gator
Mutt the Hoople
iPhoneHobbes
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"We are not human beings on a spiritual journey we are spiritual beings on a human journey" Tom Ryan Head Wrestling Coach The Ohio State university
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